In the name of reducing violence, England wants to ban kitchen knives – and anything else “pointy.” That’s right, as hard as it is to believe, this is not a parody or a twisted Internet joke.

Firearms have long been banned in England. Now the police want Brits to give up kitchen knives too, launching a “Save a Life, Surrender Your Knife” campaign to rid the country of “pointy knives.”

Just Say No to Kitchen Cutlery

Researchers “consulted 10 top chefs from around the UK, and found such knives have little practical value in the kitchen. None of the chefs felt such knives were essential, since the point of a short blade was just as useful when a sharp end was needed,” according to the British Broadcasting Company (BBC).

“A short pointed knife may cause a substantial superficial wound if used in an assault but is unlikely to penetrate to inner organs,” according to the researchers. “In contrast, a pointed long blade pierces the body like cutting into a ripe melon.”

The research was published in the British Medical Journal, arguing that “many assaults are committed impulsively, prompted by alcohol and drugs, and a kitchen knife often makes an all too available weapon.”

No Safe Place to Stab Someone

A supporting public education campaign called “No Knives, Better Lives,” provides such valuable advice as “There’s no safe place to stab someone,” and, “If you stab somebody and they die, you may face a life sentence.”

“We are keen to raise awareness of the devastating impact of knife crime and to reduce the number of families affected,” said one British policeman.

The Lancashire Police Department announced that its “officers have now given their backing to a national initiative designed to raise awareness of knife crime and encourage the surrender of dangerous weapons. People can hand in any knife at any police station with a front counter or can drop them into designated bins.”

If Knives are Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Have Knives

It is illegal to carry a knife in England. Adults convicted more than once of being in possession of a blade face a minimum six month prison sentence and a maximum of four years.”

Despite the recent criminalization of knives, crime continues to skyrocket. The BBC reports that last year “possession of knife offences rose by 10%, sexual assaults with knives went up 28%, and knife assaults increased by 13% from 11,911 to 13,488 offences.”

In the United Kingdom the rate of knife violence is approximately one in every 374 people victimized, compared with a rate of one in 750 people victimized by gun violence in the United States.

President Obama famously used the English firearms ban as an example of the “sensible gun control laws” he would like for the U.S.  His position on kitchen knives is not known. However, pro 2nd amendment advocates point to the English “knife violence” effort as yet another demonstration that government is never satisfied when it comes to controlling people’s lives.

“The ultimate goal of government and the elites is to make everyone dependent upon government for everything, especially protection, so that it can easier dominate and control the citizenry,” said one 2nd amendment advocate.  “That’s behind efforts to disarm Americans and neuter the 2nd Amendment, not to reduce violence.”

Photo credit: Dreamstime